The Licence Plate Slogans of Canada...
Dear Readers,
[Manitoba RCMP Constable Dennis] Strongquill waved down a black four-wheel-drive pickup truck with Alberta plates when it did not dim its high beams. The truck opened fire and Strongquill, the father of six children, was fatally shot. Report Newsmagazine Feb. 4, 2002.
“Friendly Manitoba”, a reassuring licence plate slogan. The same “Friendly Manitoba” where 52-year-old Dennis Strongquill was gunned down by a deranged parolee. Perhaps, “Gun-toting Manitoba”, would be a more helpful slogan. And perhaps Nova Scotia is more of a tar-coated garbage dump than an “Ocean Playground”, as its plate’s slogan would suggest. Whether you yearn to discover Ontario, or “Explore Canada’s Arctic” in the Northwest Territories or Nunavut, you can certainly do so without these annoying, and often misleading, licence plate slogans.
Quebec’s licence plate slogan, “Je me souviens—I remember” is supposed to make reference to the quote, “I remember that I was born under the lily of France but raised under the rose of England.” Few Quebecers, however, even remember what they are supposed to be remembering. In a recent telephone survey, some Quebecers thought that “Je me souviens” was talking about good times had at the Quebec Winter Carnival. One lifetime resident of Quebec thought that “Je me souviens” meant that the law would remember if someone was caught drinking and driving. Clearly Quebec’s licence plate slogan has little relevance in today’s Quebec. Furthermore, “Je me souviens” is understood by very few people outside of Quebec, thus doing a poor job of promoting the province.
When I lie on the soft Saskatchewan ground and stare up at the big Saskatchewan Sky I often see clouds. Very few, if any, of these clouds are alive. Saskatchewan’s clouds often move, and sometimes look like frogs and elephants, but they are most definitely not alive. It is because of the non-living properties of clouds and the sky in general that I would like to challenge Saskatchewan’s licence plate slogan, “Land of Living Skies”. I would, furthermore, like to suggest, “Land of Moving Clouds”, and, “Big Sky Country”, as possible replacements for the current biologically impossible slogan. I wish to justify my second slogan suggestion by saying, “Our sky is bigger than Montana’s sky.” It is also noteworthy that most of Saskatchewan does not generally have any great displays of the northern lights. The aurora borealis capital of the world is Churchill, Manitoba.
The licence plate slogan of the mighty province of New Brunswick is simply, “Conservation”. What the heck is that supposed to mean? Am I to assume that conservation is what New Brunswick is all about? Or, perhaps “conservation” is New Brunswick’s premier’s second favourite word, next to “spatula”, which would make even less sense on a licence plate. I would take The Yukon’s, “The Klondike” over “Conservation” any day. Which brings me to my next point, The Yukon. The last time I checked, The Yukon was not the Klondike. The Klondike, as I understand it, is a geographical region within The Yukon. “The Klondike” is also sometimes used to label a period of time immediately following the discovery of gold in the Klondike. Another grade “A” stupid licence plate slogan.
I don’t have any real beef with the slogans of British Columbia, The Northwest Territories, Prince Edward Island, or Nunavut. “Beautiful British Columbia”, “Explore Canada’s Arctic”, “Birthplace of Confederation”, and, “Explore Canada’s Arctic”, the respective slogans of the aforementioned provinces, although boring and mundane, are mostly accurate.
It is already blatantly obvious, without a licence plate telling me, that Ontario, and any other Canadian province for that matter, is mine to discover. “Shut up, you annoyingly obvious piece of junk! Discover this! (Whack!)”. Most Canadian licence plate slogans are stupid and inaccurate. The governing body of every province with a stupid licence plate slogan needs to take a long hard look at what their province’s licence plate actually says, and change it, ‘cause it’s stupid.
Peace & Love,
J. S. Buchanan
[Manitoba RCMP Constable Dennis] Strongquill waved down a black four-wheel-drive pickup truck with Alberta plates when it did not dim its high beams. The truck opened fire and Strongquill, the father of six children, was fatally shot. Report Newsmagazine Feb. 4, 2002.
“Friendly Manitoba”, a reassuring licence plate slogan. The same “Friendly Manitoba” where 52-year-old Dennis Strongquill was gunned down by a deranged parolee. Perhaps, “Gun-toting Manitoba”, would be a more helpful slogan. And perhaps Nova Scotia is more of a tar-coated garbage dump than an “Ocean Playground”, as its plate’s slogan would suggest. Whether you yearn to discover Ontario, or “Explore Canada’s Arctic” in the Northwest Territories or Nunavut, you can certainly do so without these annoying, and often misleading, licence plate slogans.
Quebec’s licence plate slogan, “Je me souviens—I remember” is supposed to make reference to the quote, “I remember that I was born under the lily of France but raised under the rose of England.” Few Quebecers, however, even remember what they are supposed to be remembering. In a recent telephone survey, some Quebecers thought that “Je me souviens” was talking about good times had at the Quebec Winter Carnival. One lifetime resident of Quebec thought that “Je me souviens” meant that the law would remember if someone was caught drinking and driving. Clearly Quebec’s licence plate slogan has little relevance in today’s Quebec. Furthermore, “Je me souviens” is understood by very few people outside of Quebec, thus doing a poor job of promoting the province.
When I lie on the soft Saskatchewan ground and stare up at the big Saskatchewan Sky I often see clouds. Very few, if any, of these clouds are alive. Saskatchewan’s clouds often move, and sometimes look like frogs and elephants, but they are most definitely not alive. It is because of the non-living properties of clouds and the sky in general that I would like to challenge Saskatchewan’s licence plate slogan, “Land of Living Skies”. I would, furthermore, like to suggest, “Land of Moving Clouds”, and, “Big Sky Country”, as possible replacements for the current biologically impossible slogan. I wish to justify my second slogan suggestion by saying, “Our sky is bigger than Montana’s sky.” It is also noteworthy that most of Saskatchewan does not generally have any great displays of the northern lights. The aurora borealis capital of the world is Churchill, Manitoba.
The licence plate slogan of the mighty province of New Brunswick is simply, “Conservation”. What the heck is that supposed to mean? Am I to assume that conservation is what New Brunswick is all about? Or, perhaps “conservation” is New Brunswick’s premier’s second favourite word, next to “spatula”, which would make even less sense on a licence plate. I would take The Yukon’s, “The Klondike” over “Conservation” any day. Which brings me to my next point, The Yukon. The last time I checked, The Yukon was not the Klondike. The Klondike, as I understand it, is a geographical region within The Yukon. “The Klondike” is also sometimes used to label a period of time immediately following the discovery of gold in the Klondike. Another grade “A” stupid licence plate slogan.
I don’t have any real beef with the slogans of British Columbia, The Northwest Territories, Prince Edward Island, or Nunavut. “Beautiful British Columbia”, “Explore Canada’s Arctic”, “Birthplace of Confederation”, and, “Explore Canada’s Arctic”, the respective slogans of the aforementioned provinces, although boring and mundane, are mostly accurate.
It is already blatantly obvious, without a licence plate telling me, that Ontario, and any other Canadian province for that matter, is mine to discover. “Shut up, you annoyingly obvious piece of junk! Discover this! (Whack!)”. Most Canadian licence plate slogans are stupid and inaccurate. The governing body of every province with a stupid licence plate slogan needs to take a long hard look at what their province’s licence plate actually says, and change it, ‘cause it’s stupid.
Peace & Love,
J. S. Buchanan
posted by buchanan | 7/23/2005 07:12:00 PM
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